Category: First generation

Advice, community engagement, First generation, self care

Freedom in Letting Go

CSEA Student Voice

By Annyce Torres, President of Mind + Body Wellness Student Org

There is an oft repeated saying that “anything you have to control, controls you.”

Woman in front of railing.
Annyce Torres
President of Mind + Body Wellness Student Org

What are we holding on to that is limiting our freedom that we might not be aware of? As humans, we have the ability to weigh out our options and take inventory of what is best for us. We are usually able to understand the danger of holding onto things that no longer serve us and our highest goals. Unfortunately, so many of the hardships that we experience in life are those that we create for ourselves.

As a first-generation college student, I’ve had to take a hard look at the behaviors and beliefs that I’ve held onto over the years. I’ve had to realize that the behaviors that I used to engage in no longer serve me. They were adopted as tools used to survive in situations that I am no longer in. The beliefs that I used to have such as self-doubt and other limiting beliefs will not serve me as I move forward in my attempt to learn enough to serve others. The people that I used to associate with are not necessarily understanding of the direction that I am taking my life.

Woman in front of blue sky.
Annyce Torres
President of Mind + Body Wellness Student Org

Whether we are clinging to being “right,” anger and resentment, self-pity and self-doubt, or people that are not in line with our highest goals, we run the risk of placing those attachments ahead of our own well-being. We must take advantage of our ability to think critically. And as we engage in this self-examination it is best to remember that the trap itself is not the problem. It’s the choices that we make – and continue to make – that determine whether a trap is a trap after all. It is our willingness to let go that determines our freedom to move forward and live our best life-with the degree we are earning.

I’ll leave you with this story I once read about how hunters trapped monkeys in Africa and Asia:

Monkey in a trap drawing
Monkey Trap – image reference

It’s said that in order to catch the monkey, hunters would first drill a hole in a location just large enough for the monkey’s hand to go through and place a nut or fruit in it. Seeing the food, the money would reach through to grab it, but his closed fist would be too large to fit back through the hole, trapping it in place. Even as the monkey would see the hunter closing in on him, he still would not let go of the food in order to escape.

In the end, the monkey gives up his very freedom, in exchange for a handful of food. The monkey is blinded by its attachment to what is in front of him. Let this serve as a reminder for us to forward beyond our own attachments that may be holding us back and trapping us in toxic situations.

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Continue the conversation! Take some time for yourself and connect with other students!

Join Annyce on the fourth Thursday of every month from 5-6pm PDT for the Mind + Body Wellness monthly meetings! You can join the meetings via this Zoom Link!

Open to all students! Find community with others interested in all things wellness! ✨🌻🙌

And don’t forget to follow @mindbodywellnessnu on Instagram for updates and mental health resources!

adult learner, Advice, Community College, Dreamer, English learner, First generation, nursing, Single Parent, Transfer

Si se puede! … The Story of an Adult Learner

CSEA Student Voice

Young smiling Latinx man in surgical scrubsBy Pedro Aguilar

NU Scholar Cohort January 2020, Bachelor of Science, Nursing – Los Angeles Region, CA.

My story can be told from many perspectives. I am a community college graduate who transferred to National University after having a change of heart. While I had wanted to pursue a Master’s degree in Social Work, my work in mental health led me to pursue a degree as a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner. The rightness of this decision came home for me when Gavin Newsom, Governor of California, asked nursing students and other healthcare professionals to join in the fight against Covid-19. I can still remember Newsom saying “if you are a nursing school student, we need you” as he pleaded for Californians to join the California Health Corps.

I am a first-generation college graduate, single parent, English Language Learner, and adult learner. When I say adult learner, I really mean that I took my education seriously only once I became an adult. While attending community college I held many jobs: grocery clerk, crane and forklift operator, warehouse worker, cook, and painter. I was not sure what I really wanted to become in life, especially because education was not fostered where I grew up. Some of my peers went into real-estate, while others became working professionals like their parents. I, on the other hand, was just trying to find myself and generate a plan for my future.

 

One day during sociology class my instructor shared her experience working with troubled youth. I clearly remember her saying, “One day they love you, another day they are trying to hurt you, but working with them is so rewarding.” What she said inspired me, so after class I asked if she would write me a letter of recommendation. Soon after I became a youth counselor and began my career in social services. This experience taught me that you can find inspiration and ideas from the most unlikely places or comments made by the people around you.

Young man in face mask participates in COVID-19 relief efforts
“Showing others the way” means giving back and letting others know that if you overcame these obstacles, they can too.

“Show others the way” were a few of the words written on my yearbook by my English high school professor, Mrs. Olivas. I did not follow the traditional pathway of going to school, getting a good job or career, getting married, having a family, and living happily ever after. My life took some sharp turns along the way – but after running a few stop signs, getting a few speeding tickets, and repairing a flat tire or two, it eventually brought me where I am today. If you have a familiar story, keep going, and remember that you are not just succeeding for yourself, but that you are showing others the way.

If I had given up when I was in high school, it would have been expected because children that come from broken homes and who are English learners have a higher rate of dropping out.

If I had given up when I was in community college, it would have been expected of me because adults who don’t have a strong support system and who must work through their education have a lower chance of completing a two-year degree.

Diverse group of nursing students and their instructor in hospital setting
Pedro and other passionate student nurses in Los Angeles Cohort 20 celebrate the completion of another class with Professor Patricia A. Bridewell.

If I had given up after graduating community college it would have been expected of me because I was already a part-time parent and full time mental health professional, and had taken a few years off from school. When I attempted to go back, I was told that if I wanted to switch my major, I had to wait in the back of the line because I had lost priority registration. My counselor even told me, “We get that a lot, people are afraid to finish.” I explained to her that she was wrong – I was not afraid to finish, I just knew what I wanted to do.

If I had given up, I would have had to sit down one day and explain to my daughter how I found a million excuses to give up along the way. The thought that she would see a defeated man as opposed to a role model is what keeps me in the fight. I would rather keep my dreams alive and be the light for other dreamers that have lost sight in their path to success. Don’t ever give up! Si se puede!

YoungSmiling Latinx father and daughter in formal attire against a natural backdrop
Pedro and his daughter – Celebrating life’s successes, and looking forward to conquering new challenges. Si se puede!

English learner, First generation, Graduate Student

First Generation Student Success

CSEA Student Voice

Claudia Garcia

Inaugural Cohort, Master of Family Therapy, San Diego Region

For many students, the path to college is paved by the example of their parents or grandparents. For first generation college graduates, like me, college is a path that must be created as you go. As a teenager, I had the goal to become a college graduate and often wondered if it was just a dream. My great-grandmother did not know how to read, write or count and my grandmother only attended the first grade. As I graduated high school, I did not know what tuition was and I remember searching the meaning of FAFSA.  My parents supported me through my journey but also struggled to navigate a system that was new to them. While I faced the challenges of being a first-generation college student, my family supported me and learned with me. I soon realized that in obtaining a college education I was not only accomplishing my goal but the dream of the generations before me. At the same time, I was paving the way for the generations that will come after me. Today, I am a college graduate and so is my younger sister. Looking back, the courage and determination instilled in me are what inspired me to meet my goals. These qualities enabled me to turn my goals into reality and become the first person in my family to obtain a college education.

In the present, I wish my younger self knew there are people who want to help. Besides family, there are advisors, mentors, students and professors who provide valuable support. It is astonishing how many people are interested in the success of others and all you must do is ask for the help. I wish other first-generation students were aware of the amount of support the college community provides. I must acknowledge, that my experience in college was possible because of the people that explained what FAFSA was and defined tuition to my parents when I needed to enroll. Through my time in college I learned to accept the fear of the unknown. While seeing others be confident in living the college experience I struggled to understand if I was doing things correctly. I failed to understand that they had parents and possibly many generations before them who had done this before. As first-generation college students, we must acknowledge that it is acceptable to be afraid because we are doing something new and something that is unfamiliar to us. While at times it may feel like you do not belong in college, you must remind yourself of what got you there.

The most important thing to remember is that college may be hard, but it is worth it. Having a goal and vision for where you are going in makes it a bit easier. Learning to be a college student while you are a college student can be challenging itself and having a specific goal reminds you of where you are going.  Lastly, as a student, I have learned of the importance to give yourself permission to ask for help and create your own path. It is acceptable to need help navigating college even for people who are not first-generation students. You are not the only person doing this for the first time and you are creating your unique path to a college education.